There is a lot of talking around low self-esteem. Really, what is so much important about it? Still, the thing is that there are a lot of things that depend on the adequate self-esteem. Success and failure is frequently connected not only with the amount of effort made but rather with the way a person believes in oneself and in the success itself.
A person’s reality is always created by this very person himself. However, this is a tricky thing as the ideas about the world and self build up in a person through his experience and feedback that he receives from the external world. These things are dramatically influential in childhood and early years and they are the major factor that affects a person’s self-perception. In case a lot of these things had negative hues, it is very likely that a person will have irrational perceptions of self and low self-esteem.
Low self-esteem will never nourish in the conditions of love, support, belief and appreciation, in other world, in normal conditions a person should grow up. In case it happens differently, a person starts to doubt his abilities, worthiness and so on. In other words, low self-esteem develops and causes more and more negativity and evokes depression frequently.
In other unhappier cases low self-esteem can be fraught with more serious problems such as depression, mental and physical disorders, child adolescent violence and cases of teenage pregnancies, situations when people start to harm themselves to give vent to their feelings and considering suicide are also frequent.
In order to help such a person and make him more confident in himself and altogether less inclined to irrational sad contemplating it is important to understand what the main reasons behind a person’s low self-esteem are. The causes are different but they have one thing in common – all of them stem from the childhood and therefore can be deeply unconscious.
First of all parents and family are very important. In fact, it is primary influential factor that impacts the development of a person’s character. In case parents give little support and are bitterly disappointed in their kids for they do not constantly keep up with their expectations, it can lead only to a person’s constant feeling of unworthiness. It also evokes troubles in thinking independently. And it is undoubtedly caused low self-esteem to flourish.
Lack of affection and attention can negatively impact self-image of a person and his self-appreciation and perception. Neglected kids frequently experience difficulties in communication and trusting other people. And they tend to underestimate themselves as well.
The same could be said about kids who happened to experience abuse in their childhood age. It may be physical or mental but no matter which one or both it creates a very lasting effect, which is very negative and frequently only helped with the help of a specialist.
Low self-esteem nourishes broadly on excessive criticism. In healthy shares it is useful and teaches a person to treat himself adequately as well as his actions and aims. However, if every action and movement is criticized both by parents and (even worse sometimes) by peers, a person very soon loses the ability to estimate himself adequately. This especially refers to school bullying and harassment. People who used to experience these things as kids frequently end up with depression and in the chair of a psychologist. Their low self-esteem needs much time to be raised.
One of the most frequent causes of low self-esteem in the modern world is mass media induced expectations of appearance.
Looks play really great role in the way a person feels and estimates himself. At school, if a kid is somehow different, it can cause picking on and jokes and offensive remarks. They build up and a kid starts to believe that this is exactly how he is – ugly and unworthy. The idea of incompatibility of him and this competitive society remains firm in his head. It may also take a lot of time to make a person to believe that it is not true, and moreover, not important.
Low self-esteem is also a consequence of some former negative experience in whatever field. In case a person failed somewhere, he is likely not to try the same thing again and loses faith in himself. This is especially true if there is a disposition for underestimation of one?s abilities.
Negative experience is firmly connected to the luck of success. Low self-esteem here develops in people who do not understand the middle – they accept only failures or success. If they fail, they feel worse. There are a lot of other factors of low self-esteem development but these are major ones.